You know what's really embarrassing?

Going back and reading my past writing.

I don't think I'm going to do that anytime soon. For now, I'm going to continue updating this blog. I have a lot of writing I haven't published on here yet. Life is good. I start summer classes Monday. I have new roommates for the fall. I've met some cool people at KSU. I've started going to activist events in Atlanta. I'm working out more, I'm eating healthier, and I'm making time for me.

Most importantly, I have hope. I have hope that I will get better. I have hope that I'll graduate college. I have hope that I'll maintain healthy relationships and friendships. I have hope that I can get through a day without engaging in healthy habits.

For everyone who has stuck with me and supported me, thank you. For everyone who let me down, for everyone who judged me, for everyone who decided I was "too sad," to interact with, I hope that everything in your life works out. I hope you never have a time in your life where you become fragile. I hope you never have a time where you experience disappointment, and a time where you just need kindness. Because to need that, and not receive it from some people, hurts a lot. I hope you never have to experience that hurt.

During this little hiatus from school I slept. I slept for hours, and didn't leave my room. I laid in bed, and sometimes I didn't eat. I sat waiting for this break to go by, and I was angry. I was really mad at myself, and my situation, and I was mad that my friends got to do things that I couldn't do. I felt forgotten. But then I started doing better. I started going to therapy, and leaving the house. I wasn't tired anymore. I started smiling again. I even began texting people back. Eventually I got a job. I went to that job every day, and I worked my ass off. I ended up quitting to focus on school, but that job helped me a lot. It gave me something to do. Eventually the break went by, and now I'm already starting school again.

I've learned so many things that I can't even begin to write about, because it just blows my mind. But I've changed. People can see it, and I can feel it. This experience has matured me in so many ways. I'm so confident in who I am as a person, and as a woman, and especially as a Black woman. I feel so strong, and it's a great feeling.

So yeah. I'm back. I missed writing, but it was a little bit painful for me. I'm excited to see where this next phase of my life takes me.